True Life: I'm a Hoarder

In my last post, I briefly mentioned that I'm a recovering hoarder. Transitioning to minimalism forced me to become honest with myself. The truth was I had a bad habit of collecting and keeping things just for the sake of it. 

I know there's a psychological reason behind my hoarding though it's really easier to just blame my mom. Over the years I've noticed she also had kept things past their expiration. So I like to think it was just a bad habit that I picked up from her. If my mom can keep all her stuff from the Stone Age, then why can't I?

I don't know why my mom keeps and saves things forever and ever. There may be a deeper reason or it could be that she just likes keeping things and she'll get rid of it when she feels like it. I felt that the latter was my reasoning for hoarding. But as I was starting my minimalist journey and cleaning out stuff, I found it harder to give rid of a bulk of things. 

The reasons for me keeping things for way past their time is simple: I didn't have a lot growing up so as I got older and got my first job at 16, I was able to buy things that my mom denied me. This probably also why I kept a lot of my childhood toys for a long time too: to hold onto to the time my mom actually bought me the things I desired despite the lack of funds. These things were a reminder in some distorted way. I didn't want to let them go. I felt that by letting them go, I would never be able to get them again. 

Fast forward to ten years later and my apartment is full of shit I don't need but having a hard time getting rid of. But I knew this needed to happen and I wanted to follow through on my experiment. I took my time. I had to rationalize that it's just a material item; it can be replaced in some way if it's really that deep; I'm in a better place now financially; I don't need to keep these things anymore. 

It wasn't easy at first but it became easier over time. After reading several articles and books on minimalism and decluttering, I became more at ease. I started asking myself if these items truly bring me joy and will I use them in the near future. If the answer was no, then it had to go. If I wasn't sure, I kept it until I did my next round of donations. If it was still there and I hadn't even thought about it, adios.

I wouldn't say I'm completely cured of my hoarding tendencies. There are still things that I do collect such as mugs and crystals. I almost cried when I trashed a lot of my lipsticks. But I knew that I was not going to wear them. Now my bag collection? Yeah, I'm taking my sweet ol' time. 


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