Why You Should Keep Your Dreams To Yourself
"If they don't know your dreams then they can't shoot 'em down." - J. Cole
So, though I've been vocal on my blog about what my career goals are (ICYMI: working with animals, writing books, & seeing where this blog takes me), I've been rather silent about them in my personal life. Only a hand full, and I mean a hand full (meaning those who don't read or even know I have this blog), of people know what I want to do with my life. I've been rather quiet up until recently to avoid unnecessary commentary from the peanut gallery. Now, I'm wishing I kept my mouth shut like usual.
At work one Saturday, I've decided to tell one of my coworkers, Bee, my career aspirations. Only one other coworker knew and has been extremely supportive of my endeavors. Because I also have a close relationship with Bee, I figured I'd tell her. The last she remembered was that I was going to be a teacher so I felt I should probably catch her up.
I told her that I realized that I'm just not interested in kids and that my more recent career endeavors included counseling, hence my current graduate program. But I wasn't sure if I was able to deal with that day in and day out along with my disdain for the human race. (Sidebar: still want to counsel but more so through writing, not face to face every day). So I then relayed to her my current and permanent career path: my desire to work with animals.
Because she's usually so nice, loving, and rather supportive, I expected nothing less than that. But I was little taken back when I did not get the usual response from her. Instead I got: "I like animals but I don't like love them. Why not concern yourself with starving children, the homeless, and things like that, you know?" Now, I will say I am paraphrasing here but that was the gist of what was said. Though I was in my feelings, I quickly rebutted and told her that I love animals and that they bring me a joy that people don't always bring to me. I do care about starving children and the homeless. It's just not something I want to pursue any further than what I already do.
She understood and then became supportive. But it wasn't until after my rebuttal that I got the support that I didn't need but nice to have. Then it hit me, why did I even bring it up in the first place? Why couldn't I just leave it at I'm actively looking for a new job? Why did I feel the need to tell her my dream? It only led to me being insulted and defensive. I get it, not everyone cares about animals the way I do. But that doesn't mean diminish what I want to do because it doesn't fit who you are.
This isn't to call out Bee because I love her and 95% she always means well. Perhaps its my love for her and her usual understanding that made me want to spill it. But now I get why some people are secretive about their projects. Sometimes you can show them better than you can tell them.
I know manifestation principles state that you should be speak your desires into existence. But perhaps, speak them to yourself or to people who truly understand your mission and where you are in life. You can't just tell everybody because they might not get it. And if they don't get it, they will judge based on their views and limited thinking.
So whenever you tell someone your dream and they shoot it down, hit them with a "don't believe me, just watch."
Be blessed and prosper,