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Black and Bipolar

June 2015
I finally made the appointment. But it was only because I promised Lala that I would. After taking several online tests to fake diagnose me, it was time to schedule an appointment and because I promised Lala I would. I like to keep my word.

For Colored Girls Who Still Consider Suicide

In October of 2016, I checked myself into the ER because that's what my psychiatrist told me to do when I'm feeling suicidal. But it was more than a feeling. It was an idea that I was finally going to make a reality. I was going to end it all that night.

Let's Talk About God

Hi guys! I know my blogging has been a bit sporadic but it's with good reason. I was going through a bit of a rough patch: quit my job on a whim, mother was in the hospital for a week, going weeks without hearing back from jobs, savings depleting by the minute, etc. But there's always a light at the end of every tunnel. My mom has been released from the hospital and has been doing better, my savings will stop depleting soon thanks to extra money coming in, and most importantly I found a job! 
God has been moving in my life. Definitely not at lightening speed but it's progress. Though I do plan on eventually sharing what happened to during that 6 week period of uncertainty, I also want to hear from you. Let's talk about God. 
So for the next few weeks (maybe months), I will be taking submissions on your stories about your journey with God. Here's what I'm looking for:
• Discuss your journey with God (it could be general or a specific situation, the more specifi…

Not Sight But Faith

Over the course of a few weeks, I've been contemplating on what I'm exactly doing with my life. I'm 27 years old, obtained two degrees, and still living at home with my moms. Oh, and kinda sorta broke. Let's also not forget working at a job I KNOW is not good for my mental illness.

True Confessions: I Hate Therapy

I found myself feeling not like myself. I was erratic, impulsive, simply out of order and didn't know why. I couldn't contain the overflow of emotions that seem to hit me unexpectedly. Or perhaps they were always there, slowly seeping through and it finally caught up with me. I started unraveling online. I was not okay.

When You Don't Want What You Prayed For

When you try your best but you don't succeed:
For a long time, I had wanted a career in the veterinary field. This was before I even graduated with my bachelors degree. The intent was to have a job that I like in the meantime while I figure out what I wanted to do with my life. But as years went on, I started to feel like I should pursue a career in veterinary because of my love of animals. For a moment, I was regretting being in a grad school paying thousands for a career I didn't think I wanted anymore. Because I'm not one to waste money, I figured at the very least I can finish my degree, even if it may go to waste. But it didn't matter anyway. No veterinary jobs were calling me back nor were counseling related jobs.

Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?

Ever since I've gotten diagnosed, one of my biggest fears is that no one will want to be with me because of my illness. Even before the diagnosis, it was evident in almost all of my relationships that my partners were not about this life. It started to make me wonder will I always wake up alone.